Day 9 of 35
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A blog dedicated to the popular mobile game, The Simpsons: Tapped Out
The Springfield Police are finally ready to go after the real criminals. The most corrupt characters will finally see their day in court! What’s that? There is no court house building in the game? Then straight off to jail with the lot of you. You may be asking yourself, after sending nearly the entire town off to the slammer, who are the most corrupt characters in town? The politician and the mobsters of course. They’ll be going away for a long, long… twenty-four hours. Who needs their day in court when that’s the entire length of your prison sentence? After this the police can go back to doing what they do best, taking trips to Lard Lad Donuts.
Quimby: I hope that with all the increased police activity, you aren’t having any trouble, er, conducting business.
Fat Tony: The only difficulty I have encountered is that there are not enough attendees at the racetrack to boost the betting pools.
Quimby: I’ll see to it that the police release anybody who’s got a racing sheet on him or who looks clinically depressed enough to go to the track.
Fat Tony: Boys, we live in fortuitous times.
Legs: How’s that, boss?
Fat Tony: Our legitimate enterprises usually have to operate within a certain shroud of secrecy.
Fat Tony: But all the petty crimes have been keeping the polizia’s attention away from us.
Fat Tony: It’s refreshing to be in such a relaxed and stress free state while we strong-arm, murder, and swindle.
Eddie: We keep getting emails from the Mayor’s office telling us to let gamblers and concrete union workers out of jail.
Eddie: Clearly Quimby’s got something going on with Fat Tony.
Lou: We could stage a coup and make Chief Wiggum mayor.
Eddie: No, the Chief has said he’d never accept that job because he doesn’t want to be named “America’s Fattest Mayor.” Let’s investigate Quimby.
Lou: Mayor Quimby, we have evidence linking you to a known organized crime syndicate in Springfield.
Lou: You are under arrest!
Quimby: You, ah, you can’t do this. I’ll see to it that none of you has a job in law enforcement again!
Wiggum: Well, it’s a bit of a go-nowhere field, anyway. I’ve been urging Ralphie to go into computer programming.
Wiggum: Wow, who would have thought Mayor Quimby was corrupt? He’s got such a symmetrical face!
Lou: So, can we go after Fat Tony now, Chief?
Wiggum: Yeah, now that Quimby’s not protecting him anymore, let’s show him who’s the real boss around here.
Eddie: How are we going to play it? They’ve got a lot of guns.
Wiggum: We’re going to distract them by ordering a huge pizza delivery to their address.
Wiggum: There could be a lot of carnage this time, boys. I’m planning to rip through a deep dish sausage on my own!
Wiggum: Fat Tony, your days of snubbing your finger at the law are over!
Fat Tony: Is that so, officer?
Fat Tony: I would be very interested to know what you intend to charge me with, because I have been scrupu Lou’s in every single one of my…
Wiggum: Tax evasion!
Fat Tony: Legs, have we been scrupu Lously paying our taxes?
Legs: We’ve never paid any taxes, boss.
Fat Tony: So I’m guilty of the same thing as every charity and religious cult in America? Well, looks like we’re in for a little vacation, boys.
Lisa: Now that a huge organized crime ring has been put behind bars, maybe this town can return to normal.
Bart: Don’t get carried away, Lisa. They’re only going away for 24 hours. Why can’t we send them away for longer, anyway?
Lisa: Because it’s more fun to tap on all forty of your characters every single day to send them on 24-hour missions!
Bart: It is?
Lisa: Apparently. Now shut up and make me do next week’s homework!